End of CTs

Hello! Back to this space after the past 2 hectic weeks. I feel like I'm in a really weird state right now? I don't really feel happy that CTs are over HAHA I feel more relieved I guess? Because there's still work to be done over these 2 weeks of break.. And bam reality kicks in and 4 weeks more till finals (wtf?) Feels like this sem passed too quickly?? I don't know.. 4 days per week and bam here we are at week 9... Can't believe it honestly. But this sem has also been great with the people that i've become closer to, proj mates & the other classmates :)

Well anyway, throughout the whole of CTs while I was studying.. I kept thinking "what am I doing this for? Why am I studying all these.." Honestly, last year at this period I never had a thought of coming to Business Studies in NP. Sure I wanted to get into NP because it was one of my ideal polytechnics, but I really didn't have an intention to come to BS.. I wanted to go Arts Business Management? Or Landscape Horticulture and Design LOL. I was quite into the idea of arts or design, not business!

I kinda decided that I wanted to enter BS only when I went to NP's open house 3 days before the O level results were out. And at that point of time what could I have done to change my grades? Haha so I was just thinking if my grades were good enough then.. Im lucky. And wow miracles do happen, and here I am in NP BS. But honestly I went to this course only because I didn't know what else to do? Business studies is a really general course for business and I just thought maybe i'll enter into this course maybe i'll learn a few things that i can apply in the future? Since Singapore is all about business (the harsh reality). Honestly I'm so bad at a few modules la? Everyone is so freaking smart in business. No wait, they're naturally smart. Can't even emphasise it further. And here I am like some.. fish out of water.

Well up till now I have yet to find out what I really like/want to do. These whole period during CTs I was just thinking how great it would be if I was really capable in something. Of course, being capable in something doesn't just require talent, it requires hard work too. But I have yet to find something I really like to do and I am capable in.. I really wish I was good in something. Maybe if I knew what I was capable in earlier I wouldn't be in this course.. I would be pursuing what I was good in. But I'm pretty glad I'm not the only lost soul here... Some of my friends are also a confused teen like me HAHAHA. Im really envious of those who have a goal.. or some family business to take over. At least you're able to work towards something! Okay so this is pretty much what I thought over this week, pretty frustrating.

Anyway, just something really random; but I'm really glad I'm more positive (I guess) now compared to the person who I was at this day last year :) Christmas is coming in a few days time, this year would probably the first year that I'm getting small gifts for my friends? Good way to start the habit I guess? :) Alright, till the next update hehe.

pew pew